anyone else with boyfriends in college who are too busy to know ur alive?

[amanda509]

self explanitory. boyfriend is in college now, and is too busy to acknowledge the fact i exist...i have ALWAYS made time for him, even when i was stressed and busy..but he is now going to college and working 3rd shift (and too dumb to find another job) and will run himself into the ground...he has time to see me, but he chooses to do stupid stuff with it..like play capture the flag for 2 hours knowing his body hasnt had that much exercise in 2 years..and is now on his 3rd day in intense pain from it...

so now he has proposed an idea of "taking a break" and its only his first week of college. im pissed. i understand he is busy, but really?

i really dont mean to sound selfish about it...but any advice?

 

[Trillian]

It doesn't sound great, Amanda, hate to say it. No good advice, but maybe give him space, let him get it out of his system, and see what he wants in a few months time. How long have you been together?

 

[amanda509]

It doesn't sound great, Amanda, hate to say it. No good advice, but maybe give him space, let him get it out of his system, and see what he wants in a few months time. How long have you been together?

about 2 years off and on, this last time has been since February/March and i was really sure this was "THE" time that would keep us together for a long time..we never had any fights, we always went out and did cool things, even dressing up for a simple date, just really liked being around eachother, we shared dorky passions like watching all the star wars movies in one day...making potato cannons...the list could go on.

im just soo afraid of losing him...2 times, ive had boyfriends who were put into a new situation and swiped up by some whore...yea, i trust him, but i will NEVER trust another girl around him...-.- you can obviously tell i dont have many female friends because of it lol.

 

[Solid Snake]

People need their "me time".

Thats everyone.

You are still very young, and while I dont mean to say you should neglect feelings, just keep it in mind that you both are still growing as individuals.

Most young couples will end up separating eventually when not together for long periods of time. This is because of the above reason. At that age your learning, and changing alot.

You yourself may find that you feel more distant in areas where you where both close before.

Things rarely turn out how people anticipate them to, and even more so when you are younger, and have less life experience to judge situations off of.

Just enjoy things for now, and no matter what, it will turn out just fine. I promise.

(Oh, and it wasnt ever any other girls fault, those guys were not "stolen". They gravitated towards other interests. Are you not glad they did though, as you have found others to enjoy your life with? Try looking at things in the positive manner, its always present in any situation...)

 

[amanda509]

People need their "me time".

Thats everyone.

You are still very young, and while I dont mean to say you should neglect feelings, just keep it in mind that you both are still growing as individuals.

Most young couples will end up separating eventually when not together for long periods of time. This is because of the above reason. At that age your learning, and changing alot.

You yourself may find that you feel more distant in areas where you where both close before.

Things rarely turn out how people anticipate them to, and even more so when you are younger, and have less life experience to judge situations off of.

Just enjoy things for now, and no matter what, it will turn out just fine. I promise.

(Oh, and it wasnt ever any other girls fault, those guys were not "stolen". They gravitated towards other interests. Are you not glad they did though, as you have found others to enjoy your life with? Try looking at things in the positive manner, its always present in any situation...)

thanks im not expecting to stay with him forever..but just wanted it to last longer than this :/ ive spent my whole life alone (im not exaggerating, believe me), as a little kid i was always out in the woods "pretending" or catching animals, or anything like that...all alone, everyone else thought i was weird but anyways, ive been soo used to always doing things with him, now, i dont know what to do with myself! i go to school, go to work, take care of the reptiles, and then what?..normally that space would be filled with watching a movie with him, or going out to eat, or fishing, you get the point

and i am glad they left when they did, but if it wasnt for the girls "enticing" them..they wouldnt have left, at least not then. girls are vile creatures...no lie. -.- ive only had 3 female friends my whole life, and one is dead, and the other two are going to college as well...so therefore, i have no friends either

I FEEL LIKE A HERMIT! or a lonely reptile obsessed person...

 

[camaleonte82]

let me put it this way.
we have had troubles for months.
i scream my head off about stuff to no avail.
classes start and suddenly he is miserable and everything he is miserable about is the same stuff i was miserable about for MONTHS
today. after a big stink. we are turning the chameleon room into my bedroom and at the end of the lease im moving out.
LIFE SUCKS

 

[laurie]

No, but I guess I can always hope.

 

[squeekz1992]

thanks im not expecting to stay with him forever..but just wanted it to last longer than this :/ ive spent my whole life alone (im not exaggerating, believe me), as a little kid i was always out in the woods "pretending" or catching animals, or anything like that...all alone, everyone else thought i was weird but anyways, ive been soo used to always doing things with him, now, i dont know what to do with myself! i go to school, go to work, take care of the reptiles, and then what?..normally that space would be filled with watching a movie with him, or going out to eat, or fishing, you get the point

and i am glad they left when they did, but if it wasnt for the girls "enticing" them..they wouldnt have left, at least not then. girls are vile creatures...no lie. -.- ive only had 3 female friends my whole life, and one is dead, and the other two are going to college as well...so therefore, i have no friends either

I FEEL LIKE A HERMIT! or a lonely reptile obsessed person...

I totally agree with you. Girls suck. I was/am always the girl who older people say "Oh, your so personable" and stuff like that, but people my age want nothing to do with me. And I agree about the lonely hermit reptile obsessed thing. I feel like that too lol. So don't worry, we can be lonely reptile ladies together lol

 

[DanSB]

No, but I guess I can always hope.

Hoping for a college boyfriend or to be left alone? (or both?) ha haa

I totally agree with you. Girls suck. I was/am always the girl who older people say "Oh, your so personable" and stuff like that, but people my age want nothing to do with me. And I agree about the lonely hermit reptile obsessed thing. I feel like that too lol. So don't worry, we can be lonely reptile ladies together lol

Girls (women) are completely awesome you are both wrong!

Men are perfectly capable of resisting anyone hitting on them should they be so inclined. The problem is, especially when still young, we are very seldom so inclined.

The truth is both boys and girls are equal when it comes to going after someone who is in a relationship it just doesn't bother you so much when a man tries to "steal" away a woman because that doesn't effect you. And the real real truth is nobody can be stolen away from someone else. People are not objects that can be stolen from one person to another like an object.

You Girls always trying to treat us guys like your personal property!

 

[ISA my Veiled]

Sorry you are having trouble with your boyfriend. It isn't a fair situation to you when you do so much for him. As a person on the other hand of a committed relationship I totally understand where you are coming from. He probably wants the break because he doesn't have the time and the stress of having to keep up with it is a little much. I personally don't believe in breaks myself because it is a excuse sort of way of getting out of it without him having to worry about you being to upset. I mean honestly if he is going to be like that and doesn't want to give you any alternative to it I don't think it is worth your time. But I mean that is your choice whether you want to or not. You sound like you are a very good girlfriend and judging by conversations I have had with you you are very nice. Hope this helps you out a bit. PM if you need to talk anymore.

Ben

 

[KarmaChameleon1337]

Soon he'll realize what he's missing

 

[amanda509]

Soon he'll realize what he's missing

lol i hope so. i just inherited a huge snake that will now be taking his place whats better than cuddling with a snake???!!!?!???!

 

[amanda509]

Sorry you are having trouble with your boyfriend. It isn't a fair situation to you when you do so much for him. As a person on the other hand of a committed relationship I totally understand where you are coming from. He probably wants the break because he doesn't have the time and the stress of having to keep up with it is a little much. I personally don't believe in breaks myself because it is a excuse sort of way of getting out of it without him having to worry about you being to upset. I mean honestly if he is going to be like that and doesn't want to give you any alternative to it I don't think it is worth your time. But I mean that is your choice whether you want to or not. You sound like you are a very good girlfriend and judging by conversations I have had with you you are very nice. Hope this helps you out a bit. PM if you need to talk anymore.

Ben

thanks. i agree, if he wanted to see me, he'd make time, no matter how busy his schedule is. but i do understand his studies are important and he needs his job to pay for it....but i suppose cuddling with my new snake, thor, will have to do :/

 

[ISA my Veiled]

thanks. i agree, if he wanted to see me, he'd make time, no matter how busy his schedule is. but i do understand his studies are important and he needs his job to pay for it....but i suppose cuddling with my new snake, thor, will have to do :/

Yeah but I work 40 hours a week, go to school, my girlfriend lives an hour away and I still make time. So it is very possible...Not trying to make him sound like a douche but I love my girlfriend more than anything and she means the world to me. Also she is my best friend so making time whenever possible is always easy for me and is an easy decision. Idk why he doesn't ask you to help him study or anything.

 

[amanda509]

Yeah but I work 40 hours a week, go to school, my girlfriend lives an hour away and I still make time. So it is very possible...Not trying to make him sound like a douche but I love my girlfriend more than anything and she means the world to me. Also she is my best friend so making time whenever possible is always easy for me and is an easy decision. Idk why he doesn't ask you to help him study or anything.

idk either..ive offered, but i just dont know.. :/ its good to hear you being as committed to her as you are

 

[ISA my Veiled]

idk either..ive offered, but i just dont know.. :/ its good to hear you being as committed to her as you are

Well 5 years will do that I just realize that she is important to me and worth my time, every second. It pisses me off when guys are just being an a** to someone like yourself who really cares. Just annoys me.

 

[azgnoinc]

Yeah but I work 40 hours a week, go to school, my girlfriend lives an hour away and I still make time. So it is very possible...Not trying to make him sound like a douche but I love my girlfriend more than anything and she means the world to me. Also she is my best friend so making time whenever possible is always easy for me and is an easy decision. Idk why he doesn't ask you to help him study or anything.

I completely agree here, but when I was early 20 something I didn't realize just how good I had it till they were gone, or my actions had driven my girlfriends away. I am also working 40 plus hours a week, going to school in the evenings, raising 30 plus chams (mostly babies) and STILL make time for my girlfriend who lives about 80 miles away EVERY weekend, but she is an awesome lady & I love to spend time with her.
At your young age (assuming by your pic) I would suggest finding other things to occupy your time and moving on with YOUR life instead of waiting around for ANY guy who doesn't make time for you and showing you that you ARE appreciated - relationships are give and take, not give and give and give.

Cheer up kiddo, there is another reptile loving guy out there who is yet to find you and your special qualities.

 

[ISA my Veiled]

I completely agree here, but when I was early 20 something I didn't realize just how good I had it till they were gone, or my actions had driven my girlfriends away. I am also working 40 plus hours a week, going to school in the evenings, raising 30 plus chams (mostly babies) and STILL make time for my girlfriend who lives about 80 miles away EVERY weekend, but she is an awesome lady & I love to spend time with her.
At your young age (assuming by your pic) I would suggest finding other things to occupy your time and moving on with YOUR life instead of waiting around for ANY guy who doesn't make time for you and showing you that you ARE appreciated - relationships are give and take, not give and give and give.

Cheer up kiddo, there is another reptile loving guy out there who is yet to find you and your special qualities.

Yeah being only 20 myself I have kind of grown up early lol most guys my age go out and get wasted and all of that, just not for me. My relationship means a lot to me. Like you said, relationships are not give give and give some more.

Hey do you have any babies available? lol

 

[shaunaroxanne]

Best way to keep him is to act like you don's give a crap (even when you do). Guys get tired of a girl acting like he's their everything. They like a challenge. Act like you don't care. Don't call and don't beg. He will come around. If not, he's not the only guy in the world, there are SO many!

 

[ISA my Veiled]

Best way to keep him is to act like you don's give a crap (even when you do). Guys get tired of a girl acting like he's their everything. They like a challenge. Act like you don't care. Don't call and don't beg. He will come around. If not, he's not the only guy in the world, there are SO many!

I agree a ton with this! My girlfriend did this to me when we broke up the one time we did. Definitely makes you miss your girlfriend when she doesn't acknowledge you. Hurts really. I would also do this too.