Help me solve an argument

[Jen0413]

So my husband and I have started getting into a bit of an argument about how much Espio gets to be out of his cage. I let Espio out of his cage every day for an hour or two so that he can roam around the sun room. To do this though, I have to handle Espio at least twice a day, getting him out of his cage and putting him back in. Espio loves free ranging around the sun room and whenever I pass by his cage he starts climbing towards me and as soon as I put my hand in his cage he climbs right on me. He never shows his stress colors or puffs up at me when I get him. I also never grab him or anything from his cage, I just wait till he climbs on my hand of his own free will. Occasionally he doesn't come over to my hand and after I minute or two I just figure he doesn't feel like coming out and I leave him be. Getting him back in the cage is a big trickier, but if I lure him onto my hand with some collard greens or a small feeder he willingly comes back to me so I can put him back in his terrarium.

My husband says I'm handling him too much and should leave him alone. I think he enjoys being able to explore and since he's not stressed out being on my hand and he's only in my hand for about a minute while I move him to his room, it doesn't really matter. It's not like I'm forcing Espio to snuggle on the couch with me.

What do you smart people think? Am I handling him too much by moving him? Is handing him twice a day too much stress that it outweighs the enjoyment he gets from exploring the sun room? Unfortunately, I can't just leave his door open with a way for him to climb out. We have a pug who is very interested in the small green moving thing on the floor, and while I doubt he'd eat him I worry he'd hurt Espio while investigating the chameleon. The sun room has a door so that I can keep the dog out of it while Espio is roaming around it, but the only way to get to the sun room is the short ride on my hand.

 

[SaintJimmy]

If he comes out to you on his own, and isn't doing anything that is disturbing your husband, why is he concerned about how much time Espio gets outside of his cage?

It must be nice for the chameleon to get some free roaming time in a nice big cage rather than a very small one, and he sees you as his way to get between the two. I say it's a good thing.

I don't know if there is such a thing as "too much" free roaming time, but if the handling starts stressing him, or if he refuses to be in his own cage, that might be a thing of concern.

If he refuses to stay in his cage because every time he sees you he wants out, maybe, just maybe you should reduce his time there, or maybe make it a "special treat" time so that he doesn't feel entitled to it. But still I think that the free roam time is very good for chameleons.

I think that this argument should be solved between you two having communication rather than having someone on the internet back you up, though. Maybe just try talking to him about it?

Surely Espio doesn't critically need all the time in the room, so maybe you could compromise with your husband about something so that you two can come to terms with each other? Just to stop the arguments.

Or another decision, while drastic, may work: Keep the cage in the same room as the free roam room and just have the door open all the time. Allow no animals into the room except him and that way he can come and go from the cage as he pleases. But this means you would have to cham-proof the wall outlets, make sure he gets moisture, find a way to install multiple broad heat spots for him to bask throughout the room in case he forgets to go back into his cage to bask.

There is no "easy" answer here except: try to talk to your husband to come up with a compromise between you both. He says you take him out too much. Maybe he is not used to the idea of reptiles being "pets," or thinks you are bothering him.

The best solution is just try and come up with something together with your husband

 

[Jen0413]

The problem was we are first time reptile owners. I wanted information. Maybe argument is a strong word. For all I knew my husband could have been right. I wanted people with more knowledge about this to help me know how to best care for Espio. Letting him out or keeping him in his cage. Thank you for your opinion. I don't actually need marriage advice though.

 

[SaintJimmy]

Oh sorry, I guess I got carried away. The word "argument" lead me to believe that this was a serious issue between you two.

If that was the case, then yes, you two would need to work it out.

But it seems like it's not really. You are doing a good thing by asking others for advice for your first time owning a reptile.

I personally (as stated above) feel that you could honestly keep letting him out as long as it wasn't hurting anyone. If he starts crawling on the screen trying to get out and rips his nails off, that's an issue. If he never sits still and constantly tries to get to his free range, that's also bad.

Or you could put the cage into the free range room and have the full room available to him at all times, but like I said, that requires multiple heat and UVB lights as well as water sources which can become bothersome if the room gets water damage from that. Plus the lights can slightly raise your electricity bill

Anyway do what you feel Espio needs. Honestly some people never free range their chameleons and they get along fine. Others refuse to let their chameleons be cages (See the House of Chameleons Facebook group, it's quite radical, keeping all their chameleons "cageless" all day, but it seems to work for them, and their chameleons do get along somehow. It's strange and quite erratic, but hey, it works for them).

Do what you feel is best, there is no black and white with chameleons.

 

[Jen0413]

Thank you for your advice St. Jimmy. You've answered several of my questions on different posts before, and I really appreciate your information.

 

[junglefries]

As long as it is your chams choice and it doesn't lead to a divorce, then no issues whatsoever. Probably more beneficial than harmful. A happy cham will live longer, as we all know stress will shorten their time. Now, make a dinner and ask him for help while cooking, as to break the ice. (I know it sounds sexist that you cook, but just trying to make all 3 of you happy.) I do wonder though, is it possible your hubby is a little jealous of the attention you show your cham. Us men can be possesive of our women, you know.

 

[SaintJimmy]

Thank you for your advice St. Jimmy. You've answered several of my questions on different posts before, and I really appreciate your information.

You are welcome. I try to come on every day and answer posts that I see have zero replies just so I can give those people some attention and hope the threads take off, rather than sit with zero replies and no help, because I've been there before on different websites and it sucks not getting help. So I try and provide my thoughts.

Sometimes I accidentally get too opinionated and have had people call me out on that, but I am usually quick to correct myself if I realize I said something out of line. Anyway, good luck, and I hope you get more opinions.

As long as it is your chams choice and it doesn't lead to a divorce, then no issues whatsoever. Probably more beneficial than harmful. A happy cham will live longer, as we all know stress will shorten their time. Now, make a dinner and ask him for help while cooking, as to break the ice. (I know it sounds sexist that you cook, but just trying to make all 3 of you happy.) I do wonder though, is it possible your hubby is a little jealous of the attention you show your cham. Us men can be possesive of our women, you know.

I think that Jen already stated that she did not need marital advice, but I agree, stress does hurt them (not as much as we'd like to think, but it is harmful) and it would be best to go with whatever was causing him to be happy (Espio).