Your first Heartbreak?
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chams1
Member
Now that was funny.
Thank you Trace.
NewOwner:
Some advice from an "experienced" woman, if I may. When I say "experienced" I mean "experienced in failure". I know I am going to sound like a broken record to you, but you have yet to begin on your quest for love, if you, in fact, even know what love means. I am not putting you down by any means, but the only way you can find true love, in my opinion, is if you have failures. It is by these failures will you ever know what the meaning of true love is and how to appreciate it. Yes it hurts and yes it sucks, but you just have to figure out how you can best get through it because your life is far from over. My first "real" heartbreak was right after college. I dated a guy all 4 years of college - we were inseparable and people thought we were twins because we actually looked alike. We just wanted different things so we both ended up going different directions. To this day, this has been the hardest thing I have ever had to do. Since then, it seems like nothing has worked and I have had my share of bad endings. But I have stopped trying to control my own destiny. I have always thought that I have so much to offer someone but then if things don't work out, then I guess it just wasn't in the cards, so to speak. You cannot change the actions of another person and you just need to accept that it wasn't meant to be and focus on something that you enjoy doing that can take your mind off of it until the hurt goes away. It will eventually.
philanddeb818
Established Member
chams1 said, "I have stopped trying to control my own destiny."
Never more healing words...
Never more healing words...
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NewOwner
New Member
I am sorry for any sexist comments, if it comes to it, by all means go ahead and close the thread! Sorry about anyones Derogatory comments.
I believe i do know what love is, although hard to describe with words, i think its described with actions, and emotions.
I like what you said, 'i stopped trying to control my own destiny' Those are AWESOME words of advice, and im sure i try to control my own.. I am not trying to change her actions, im trying to understand this feeling i have.. i love her, but she doesnt love me anymore.. she has not told me why, she just texted me saying she doesnt... that was one of the hardest things ive had to do in my life.. reading those messages and waiting for the next one to come.. Cant believe she would tell me over a text..you say the only way to find true love is through having failures.. but, what if i think i have found true love? I really do love this girl, and honestly cant find anything i dont like about her. not one thing. Shes cute, nice, Polite, respectful, funny, fun, playful.. everything.. Shes the only teenager i know right now, that doesnt drink and party all the time.. me and her are the same in that aspect.. im 16, never drank, smoked, done drugs, anything..
As forest gump would say, we was like peas and carrots.
Its been 3 or 4 days now, and shes still all i think about.. cant sleep, not eating well, and not drinking enough.. just thinking about her, and going on long bikerides.. which isnt healthy, im not eating the right amount of calories per day, and then i use more then i should, biking.
This is the worst experience in my life since i was 5 when my dad passed. i would actually describe this feeling as being worse, because at 5 i didnt understand it.
Does anyone have any tips, of how to Cope with this, and Stop thinking about her?
Im going Insane doing this.. :
Zen Reptiles
Avid Member
Love ends. Deal with it.
There's TONS of perfect girls out there. I remember feeling like you when I was in my teens, but seriously after age 20 life just gets so awesome. Love as many people as you can and always make sure it is a positive experience.
There's TONS of perfect girls out there. I remember feeling like you when I was in my teens, but seriously after age 20 life just gets so awesome. Love as many people as you can and always make sure it is a positive experience.
pssh
Avid Member
Have you tried talking to her?
Well, it took me a few months, but then I started to see the lesser side of him. Eight months before I found my current boyfriend. Been together for a year and a half now.
Things really do get better after you sulk it all out. At least you know that the time you spent with her was important. Personally, I think it's good that you're upset. I think I'd be pretty mad at myself if I spent sooo much time with someone that I wasn't attached to enough to get really upset over. (If that makes any sense...)
And another thing, if it makes you feel better/if you believe in this stuff, love can be traced back to chemicals and hormones in your body. According to science, you can fall in love for any amount of time, but you always fall out. It just so happens that you can fall back in love with the same person over and over again. So it might not have been you, if that's what you think at all.
When someone breaks up with you, it's best for them, and in the long run, you. Think of it that way.
THECHAMMAN
Established Member
i dig this, but let this thread die. he's got a lot of advice, and i think this is enough...
NewOwner
New Member
Thanks man, your really helpful.
THECHAMMAN
Established Member
that's my middle name. i know what ur going through. alot of us do. but flooding this forum with advice which has been given to you 10x over is a waste of your time. just my opinion.
How about breaking up with you through a text? That is rude and disrespectful and not polite.
No one can tell people how to deal with grief. The sooner you get past this the better off you will be. You are so young. You have so much growing and developing to do.
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